Back in North Virginia…where the world is falling apart

I forgot to mention something about my trip out to Australia. If you are also my Facebook friend, you already know because my friend posted a picture of us.

There was a 7-hour delay between the 4:30pm arrival of my flight in Los Angeles from Washington DC and the 11:20pm departure of my flight to Australia. A few days before I left, I remembered my good friend in L.A. who we will call Albert because that is his name. He is a fabulous guy and I remain amazed that he hasn’t been snapped up by some worthy woman. In fact, I’m going to tell you — because he will probably not read this — that I have always thought he is one of the nicest people I have ever met.

I e-mailed Albert before I left to see if he might have time to meet on Saturday night as I would “be in town” and later clarified that I’d like to buy him dinner…at the airport. 🙂 At the time, it didn’t occur to me that I could leave the airport. Duh! To cut a long story short, he picked me up, we ate for some hours at a local restaurant (I paid!) and he dropped me back off later. A fantastic way to break up a flight!

After arriving in Los Angeles at 6:30am on the way back to Washington, I found that Albert had the temerity to go to work that Thursday. Hrmpph!

I chatted sweetly to the people in the Admirals Club and they switched my flight from a 2:15pm departure to a 9am departure. They also gave me a key to the showers (I accidentally discovered it only unlocks a specific shower — which I realize is a Good Thing). Let me tell you, traveling in a premium class on an international flight is waaayyy more fun than going Cattle Class.

After a shave and yet another wonderful shower (I’m getting a little obsessed about these, aren’t I?), I sat peacefully through the trip to Washington.

Near the end, the pilot said the “weather had returned” (how can “weather” leave??) and we would be re-routed to Richmond, Virginia. Huh? A few minutes later, he said, “Just kidding, they got it wrong, the flights after ours will be sent to Richmond” and we bounced down onto a rain-drenched airport (I am not joking — the pilots blamed it on a computerized landing). My iPhone lit up with about 30 Breaking News and News Alert emails telling me that it was raining. Raining hard enough that all kinds of major and minor roads were flooded. Hmmm. How is my basement waterproofing holding up, I wondered.

From the Airport Access Road that directly links the airport with the major highways, I saw all the stopped cars on the Toll Road and realized this must be serious. I decided not to surprise the girls with an early arrival but to call ahead.

A sobbing Brigitte picked up the phone to tell me that the rain was pouring in the basement through the window and she was trying to mop up. Oh no. I told her to be calm, it’s OK, we’ll figure it out. She needn’t feel the pressure…

I finally picked my way through the heavy traffic, after watching water pour off bridges and rush across flooded roads. From inside, I could see that outside the house, the rain had filled the basement window well and was leaking through the window and down inside the wall. In doing so, it was bypassing my waterproofing. Oh no.

Needless to say, my relaxing flight was over. It was all hands on deck to clean up the mess.

I put on some rain gear, emptied the window well (which stopped the flooding) and covered it to stop more rain getting in.

Shortly after that, I was in a hurried and harried shower (not up to my current standards at all). Drying off, I read more of my Dire Warning e-mails and discovered that a “credible” threat has been made against Washington or New York on or near 9/11. Guess I should have been checking my work e-mail too while I was away. Oops.

So my second piece of bad news is that apparently we’re all going to die soon. Or maybe just some of us. Or maybe it’s all just noise. Or maybe they’ll be quietly caught and nothing will happen. Watch this space…

It dawned as 9/9 and I missed half it because my body decided I needed a little ‘catch-up’ on sleep. I didn’t wake up until after 1pm. Yikes! It’s only 1 or 2 days a year that I sleep as long as 8 hours in a night, so I must have really needed the sleep.

9/9 is, as you may dimly recall, my birthday. There are none of the promised photos for anyone because the last week has been too busy to set that up. Did I enjoy the birthday that’s just finished? Not really, only a small part of it. Overall, it was the worst birthday ever.

… (pause) … (pause) …

Just now, I’ve decided not to share the details of the day. At least not yet. Let’s just say that I seriously considered giving up on everything for a while. There’s really only so much I can cope with at once. I don’t say this to elicit more of the kind support I’ve already received, but to explain one of two reasons that I’m considering shutting down this blog for a while. I apologize in advance for being oblique.

If I do shut down the blog, I will lurk around for a while. I will catch up on responding to comments that I have received but not replied to yet, and will add my sometimes good, sometimes bad, sometimes funny comments to posts on your blogs.

For now, it’s just good night.

About Single Dad

I married young. Now, after more than 20 years of marriage, 3 wonderful daughters, and many ups and downs, my wife has decided the marriage is over. The "About Me" and "My Background" pages on my blog have more details.
This entry was posted in Divorce and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

32 Responses to Back in North Virginia…where the world is falling apart

  1. Caroline says:

    My thoughts are with you. Sometimes we are faced with just too much and the only option is to have time to think things through and regroup. Good luck and may you find your route to a sunnier future.

    I’m rooting for you.

  2. mysterycoach says:

    Give yourself time to heal, process and just “be” … we all need a break sometimes.

  3. TikkTok says:

    Oh Sean! That sounds like it was just the last drop in the bucket, eh?

    Happy birthday anyway. May you find peace, harmony, and know you are loved. {{{{{hugs}}}}

  4. Oh, no. I’m so sorry — and I totally understand the need to withdraw, deal with it, and process. You’ve had too much in too short a time. Hugs from Oregon, where it is not raining, and I hope things look better soon.

  5. First off, Happy Belated Birthday to you. So sorry to hear it was a crappy birthday. Competely understand the need to take a break and re-group and commend you for recognizing that may be what you need to do right now. Loved the comment you left on my blog, true to your word, it was funny! Wait until you read the post I just put up! Oy!
    Look forward to hearing from you again when things settle down and the basement dries up!
    Hugs from Maple Street

    • Thanks MS.

      The basement is dry, but I will have to put down new underlay. Here’s a thing — the basement waterproofing company STILL has not returned my call from Friday (more than 72 hours now without them even calling back to find out exactly what kind of problem I have). I called again today. So, folks, bear that in mind if you consider Mid-Atlantic Waterproofing. I just *loved* being on hold today listening to their canned ad telling their Customer Service is the best and they’re available 24 hours a day. Liars…

      • Bastards!

        So how many candles would you have blown out if someone had baked you a cake?

        • Clever question. The clever answer would be “All of them.” 🙂

          The unappealing answer might be “With spittle, all of them. Without spittle, half of them”

          The here-it-is-brace-yourself answer: 48. It still has a “4” in, but when did I get old?

          • Good answer – all of them, this demonstrates that you are not on supplemental oxygen! 48, you say that like you’re 60! I’m getting ready to be crowned Miss 43! Yikes!

            What I struggle with is having a son about to turn 20! When he turned 19, that was an eye-opener for me, having met his father at 19.

            Now I say, the 40’s really are good – I’m learning so much about myself, what I want, what I need, and I’m not afraid to say it out loud – really a big milestone for me and I’m liking that. And no, don’t convert my age to months and tell me developmentally where I am in What To Expect In The 40’s! 🙂

            This is going to be good, this new path we’re all on….we’ll be okay.

            • If your 19-almost-20 son wants a 18-almost-19 girl, I’m quite willing to pay shipping charges to send my oldest daughter off to you on a trial basis. 🙂 [Ah, I am already imagining the peace and quiet, at least until you sent back one or both to me.]

              You mention a scary milestone I had never considered to this moment. Does the world end when the oldest of my 3 girls reach the age at which I started dating (as a penpal) her mother? I still have a few years to worry about that one. But a special *thanks* for making me think of it. 🙂

              • You’re welcome! 🙂 My belated b-day gift to you! Well I’m still here as I passed that milestone, so no, the world won’t end. But it takes a moment to reflect on it, deserves it. Life is funny that way.

                Will not send my son to you, your daughter deserves much better. He’s a cookie cutter of his father and has sooooo much to learn still about respect, kindness, and that leaving his father was what I needed to do for myself and my children to keep us all healthy, happy and safe.

  6. Surrey gal says:

    Happy Birthday to you doesn’t really sound right in this situation, does is… so I’ll only say I’m sorry it was one of the worst ones in your life, we all have a birthday like this at least once in our lifetime.
    Stay strong x

  7. kimberly says:

    taking a break can be a good thing. good for you.

  8. Happy Birthday, SD, and I’m sorry that you’ve had to more through your birthday in such a space…. I celebrated my 40th in midst of my marriage falling apart and got literally no celebration whatsoever because of it. I made up for it the next year by throwing myself a big party that so many friends came to that it made me cry. 🙂

    Don’t say you’re leaving, no matter how you feel right in this moment. I have taken several breaks from my blog (as you may have noticed!) when I need the quiet. Take your time and have your quiet and then see where you are. We’ll all still be here. 🙂

    Good luck to you, as always.

    • Hi TPG,

      I’m going to get myself a spreadsheet and write the approximate ages of everyone. I have little idea who is near my age, who is much younger….and I don’t think I have anyone reading this that is more than slightly older. I didn’t realize you are over [[number deleted by Internet Humanity Police]] years old.

      Crying when lots of friends come to your big party is a Good Thing. I’ll bet all the people there made you feel better and you had a great night, right? Now, imagine if Matthew, or Thomas, or I did the same thing. Would everyone look around, embarrassed? Or respond the same way to your tears of happiness? I only ask out of curiosity, not to make some Major Philosophical Point.

      Re: leaving / staying. My next blog will address that. But thank you so much for your kind thoughts on that topic.

  9. anne says:

    The world often feels like it is falling apart, but somehow, when I get a good night’s rest, some glue in some form of a friend shows up to help put 2 little pieces together. Has that happened for you yet? It will, expect it, and look for it.

    Also- writing certainly helps me stay receptive to the glue… I can be a little self-absorbed, and maybe a bit too “focused”. If I let myself get focused and self-absorbed on the story, rather than my emotions about the events, it seems to help my mood lift a bit. If I feel like I have written a post that is put-together and entertaining in some way (i.e. water pouring in window wells, and a funny obsession with showering), I shift the self-absorption. So DON’T STOP BLOGGING!

    Also, I am trying to subscribe. This is the third try, I think that you need to approve something somewhere.

    Thanks for a great blog and being a funny friend 🙂

    • First, I’ve checked my Site data and it shows you’re an active subscriber. No, wait, you’ve subscribed under your OLD blog URL. (the one with “anne….” in it). You haven’t subscribed using Good luck trying to figure that one our. Maybe you are considered as having multiple blogs by WordPress and it selected the wrong default??

      You’re right about things just showing up. Just when I needed it, I got a couple of e-mails from friends. And another friend invited us all around to dinner to save me having to do it. Things like that are soooo nice.

  10. anne says:

    PS, happy belated birthday. I was in the midst of divorce on my 40th, so I pierced my belly button and had a party. For my 46th, I announced on my blog how depressed I was about getting older, and you all came to my rescue. I made it through… somehow that tends to happen when I least expect it!

    • When you say you pierced your belly button, do you mean YOU did it? Or decided to live right on the very *edge* of civilization and have a expertly-trained professional do it? (I’ll just pause for a moment for the giggles of laughter at the “professional” comment to subside). …. la di da … Perhaps the most impressive way of doing it would have been to have it pierced AT the party! 🙂

  11. wordsfallfrommyeyes says:

    Ah, divorce – yep, I know it. Like what Anne says though – pierced her belly button and had a party! Like your post Struggling Dad 🙂

    • Hi!

      I see you also grew up in Melbourne. But you moved to the outer parts of the Milky Way: Perth. Either you have had a *really* quick pregnancy (as in a couple of weeks), or you’re doing some catch-up on your posts!

      I’m not keen on piercing things, but I think maybe a big party is a good idea for October or November!

      • wordsfallfrommyeyes says:

        Thanks for responding – keeping up with the comments must be difficult!! Yes, the milky way.

        I had a full long pregnancy, but I could not write about what unfolded, though I wanted to say it screamingly loud, crying – until I passed a decade of time. It’s not a quick pregnancy, just, I can only say the story now. The story, truth as told by my journals as they occurred, is now being released creatively, me distanced, but still wishing to express. If you can get that!

        You know, you’ve got a great blog going on. Congrats. I am certain to drop in more, and if I still feel it, I’ll subscribe 😉 xx.

  12. anne says:

    La di da, see how funny you are? : )) I am laughing. I had a professional piercer do it. I knew she was a professional bc she was wearing 2 pigtails, black fingernails, and had “Miss Kitty” tattooed all across her belly and wore a short enuf shirt for me to see it. I think you should find a Miss Kitty and pierce your nipples for your bday. Show them off at your party.

    • Hi Anne,

      Unless I’ve missed a few posts, I’m waiting to here more about the cute guy in the distant office. Or we can talk about why anyone has “Miss Kitty” tattooed on their belly (unless they know FOR SURE they will never put on weight).

      In fact, if I keep talking long enough, I might forget that you ever suggested I pierce my NIPPLES. Aiiiyyeeeee!

  13. goyagrrl says:

    Happy Belated Birthday. I am not going to try to put a shiny spin on any of it, because – yeah, it is sucky and quite frankly, it is supposed to be (given the circumstances). That being said, you can kick back and revel in the fact that the worst birthday ever has safely passed and you are still here. Cheers to that!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s